Friday, March 29, 2013

Eggs-cellent Easter?

Hullo snail mailers!!

No mail post today on account of it being Easter and me having mad respect for the Easter Bunny.

That, or I just gorged on a crapload of egg-shaped gummies and I don't think I can move and the camera is over on the other side of the house and oh my lord, the tummy hurts and I just want to lapse into a sugar coma.

Take your pick. Either way, you'll get a proper mail post next week as usual.

How are you spending your easter weekend? Once I've slept off my sugar coma, I'll be taking a day trip out to Drumheller, the Dinosaur Capital of the World. Because nothing says Easter like dinosaurs, wouldn't you agree?

Happy Easter everyone! I'll leave you with a punny joke, because we like puns here at Please Deliver To:

What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards?
A receding hareline.

Friday, March 22, 2013

2 - 2 = errr, I think I'm in real trouble now.

Apparently washi tape was so 2012; 2013 marks the year of the fountain pen obsession.

I bought my first fountain pen and my first bottle of ink last month. I distinctly remember telling my husband that I couldn't understand why people had multiple pens and multiple ink colours because I would be pretty happy with just one pen and a few ink colours.

Oh, what a fool I was.

For those of you who have been reading this blog for a while, I think you have a pretty good idea of what came next:

....if you guessed contemplating selling my kidney, then you get a prize!!

If I sold one kidney for washi tape and the other to finance my new fountain pen addiction.... I'm not a mathematical genius, but that doesn't leave me with a lot of kidneys, does it?

Any medical experts out there? I have a really serious medical question to ask: how long can a person hypothetically survive if she had less than one kidney left? At least 75 years, right?! C'mon, pure obsession should count for something!

Don't get me wrong, I still love washi tape. But it's been downgraded to a sell-a-smaller-body-part-for-it level. Like an eye! An eye sounds like a good thing to sell for washi tape. I figure I'd look hella good in an eyepatch. Arrrgh, walk the plank, ya scallywag.

Also, apropos of nothing, I've figured out my new motto in life: WWTGD? Before I do anything, I'm going to ask myself, What Would Tim Gutterson Do*? Because I could use some badass US Marshall mojo in my life.

*any Justified fans out there? Tim Gutterson is now officially a million times cooler than anybody ever after this week's episode, don't you think?.

Incoming:

Pencils from Julie in Grand Rapids

It's a zoo in here(!) from Jona

My new envelope template from Omiyage

Outgoing:

Hilarity for Rhiannon

I'm sending Julie an afro dog! All the fun of a real dog, none of the cleanup.

Get anything awesome in the mail lately?

Friday, March 15, 2013

Mind your Ps and Qs

Hello everyone!

I spent a lot of time this week thinking about gratitude and appreciation. Sometimes it feels as though the words "thank you" aren't used enough today. It's too easy to take kindness for granted, and saying thanks is a simple gesture that means a lot. It barely takes any time to send someone a message to thank them for doing something nice, for going above and beyond, for taking the time to do something that you really appreciated or enjoyed, or just for being great.

However, if there's a reason for complaint—watch out! People rarely stay quiet when they have something negative to say. I wish that people were as passionate about expressing appreciation and gratitude as they were about complaining.

This is why I'm taking the effort to write thank you notes to all the people who made my week a little bit brighter this week. I want them to know that I acknowledge and appreciate their help and support. This will include thanks for extraordinary gestures (like my best friend who always lends me craft supplies) to thanks for small details that are greatly appreciated (like a store that packaged my ink order up especially secure). I know that it's a small gesture on their part, but it means a lot to me and it's important to express that appreciation.

Have you thanked someone for doing something nice this week? Why not join me and say thanks now? We'll make it a party and everything!! You bring the chips, I'll bring the snark. All of my parties always involve a donkey and a spatula, so be sure to bring some medication if you're allergic to spatulas. Oh, and I guess donkeys too.

Incoming:

Steampunky punk goodness from Natasha, which also contained.....

This fantastic Avengers button!!! AVENGERS ASSEMBLE! Thank you, Natasha! This is my sad attempt to take a semi-artistic shot involving my new donkey note holder. (Huh, two donkey references in one blog post. It's all asses at Please Deliver To)

A letter from Talli

A BOOK! SARAH SENT ME A BOOK!!!! Thank you Sarah for sending me two of my favourite things in the world (letters and books, that is. I'm neutral at best about stickers that say "ID Recorded)!!

Awesome Paddy's Day mail from Katri

Outgoing:

Triangles for Jessica

Superheroes for Cheryl

Picket fences for Patty!

(note: if you read Patty's blog, it appears that she was recently in a car accident. OH NO! Her address is on her blog, let's send her some get well wishes and snail mail her better! Yes, I just used snail mail as a verb. And no, I'm not sure what it really means either.)

Want to know what I was especially grateful for this week? THIS. THIS MAKES MY YEAR.

Have a great week everyone! Thanks for reading this post and for visiting!

Friday, March 8, 2013

Everyone, meet Herman. Herman, meet everyone.

Hello snail mailers! Did you miss me? The six people who still read this blog may have noticed that I failed to update my blog last week. It's not my fault, I swear. The earth swallowed me up, spit me out somewhere, and it took me almost 10 days to find my way back home. And then, I immediately jumped onto my computer to write this blog post, because THAT's how dedicated I am.

So, you know what I thought a lot about this week? I talk a lot about the apocalypse, particularly one where zombies run amok, but what would happen to mail if an apocalypse really happened? Who would deliver the mail? Who would sell us stamps? Where would we buy ink and pens?! Won't someone think of the mail children?!!!

Maybe we should figure out a communication/mail system for an apocalyptic scenario. Because if TV/movies are any indication, an apocalypse is looming just around the corner. My money is on 2036 because I know those pesky Observers are coming... At least I hope the apocalypse hits, because if it doesn't happen, then my obsessive stock piling of toilet paper just looks foolish. BUT, if it does come, you're going to be knocking down my door for toilet paper and who is going to look foolish then, huh?! (it's still me, isn't it? Darn it, that always happens!)

I know it's generally fun and games at Please Deliver To, but I am 100% serious and in earnest here. Here is my suggested plan for mail delivery come the apocalypse: we start training snails to deliver mail.

REALLY.

It's time to take back the literal meaning of snail mail. I figure snails are the perfect mail delivery system because no creature—zombie, vampire, oversized goat, or otherwise—is going to mess with them because they have a shell. All that work for such little meat? NO WAY.

My snail will be named Herman and I will train Herman to deliver all my mail. Of course, he'll probably take 23 years to deliver a letter (what do you expect? He's still just a snail!), but it'll get there. Everyone knows that post by (literal) snail is the most reliable service there is.

What will your snails be named? I ask this because I need to input the info regarding your snails into my security system. Otherwise I won't get your mail. I mean, not just anyone can get past my "Stop right there! This means you!" signs. That's top-notch security right there. Even Fort Knox is jealous.

What are your thoughts on how mail can be delivered during the apocalypse?